Everyone's got a sign...
And it's always some version of "make me feel special".
Each person wants to be heard, understood, and to feel special. Humans need that. We are wired for it.
But the key is to know HOW each person wants to be acknowledged. *HINT: it's DIFFERENT for each person.
OMG. That seems like a lot of work...
​What if I told you it wasn't?
And what if I told you that actively searching for a person's 'sign' would open up better lines of communication, deeper rapport, and trust? Would it be worth it?
Just want the highlights? Scroll to the bottom to Lean In. Level Up. Leverage.
" I like long walks on the beach, deep belly laughs,
and inspirational conversation..."
Not unlike dating, discovering someone's "Make Me Feel Special" sign is obtained through asking questions, listening, and observing. Each person will tell you everything you want to know about who they are if you just take the time to observe.
In any relationship, business, personal, or otherwise, our deepest connection is made by putting focus on the other person.
Why? Because everyone's favourite topic is themselves! #truestory.
If you're fortunate enough, they'll even ask to know a bit more about you in return. In fact, I almost guarantee it. It's the law of reciprocity.
But even if they don't, they will walk away feeling that they've just had the BEST conversation with you, even if you didn't say a word.
Lean In. Level Up. Leverage.
Lean In
​Know yourself. Are you a talker? I am. I LOVE to entertain and engage with others. As a result I'm also aware that I can run circles around most people in this arena and must remember to make way for others too.
Level Up
Sometimes you can encourage deeper connection by doing the opposite of what you normally do. If you're a talker like me, you might try asking other people questions first instead, listening, then learning to speak last.
If you normally prefer to be a quiet listener, consider that people are probably pretty interested in what you have to say, so it might be the time to use your voice to connect.
Level Up
Still not sure how to better engage? Go back to the observation deck. People give off SO many clues about how they view the world if we just took the time to actually pause to take them all in. Then start with something simple, like, "Wow - you've got such energy! Especially when you talk about (fill in the blank)!
Or maybe, "you're a really great listener. Have you always been so attentive for others?"
See? Easier than you think.
Tell me, what's YOUR way of deepening rapport with others? Do you have a go-to approach? Does it work? Or is it maybe time to change it up and try something new to go further?
Comment below and share YOUR strategies!
Until next time,
